They are a timeless sibling bonding activity—a silly way to pass the time on road trips. A fun dinnertime worriedness the whole family can enjoy. Jokes for kids are unchangingly in style and can powerfully patina the mood or get your kids’ giggles out on a dreary day. Here are over 200 funny jokes for kids in a slew of categories, from Easter jokes to jokes well-nigh the weightier day of the year—their birthday!
Share these humorous quips with your kids, watch them “joke around” with their friends, and hear the single greatest sound in the world. The sound that soothes your soul like nothing else—your children’s laughter.
Funny Birthday Jokes for Kids
1. What did the birthday vellum say to the stamp?
Stick with me, we’re going places!
2. What kind of music is bad for birthday balloons?
Pop.
3. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Omar.
Omar who?
Omar gosh! It’s your birthday!
4. What’s the fanciest type of birthday party you can throw for a dog?
A ball.
5. Patient: Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.
Doctor: Next time, take off the candles.
6. Why are birthdays good for your health?
Studies have shown that people with increasingly birthdays live longer.
7. How do pickles gloat their birthdays?
They relish the moment.
8. What do you requite a 3,000-pound rhinoceros for his birthday?
I don’t know, but you largest hope he likes it!
9. When I was born, I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
10. Why were the birthday balloons in the bathroom?
It was a birthday potty!
11. What did one candle say to the other at the end of the birthday party?
I’m feeling a little burned out without that party!
12. Why do candles unchangingly go on the top of birthday cakes?
Because it’s nonflexible to light them from the bottom.
13. What do you unchangingly get on your birthday?
Another year older.
14. Why was the soccer player sad on his birthday?
Because someone gave him a red card.
15. What don’t kangaroos like well-nigh birthdays?
They only get to gloat them in leap years.
16. Why did the student eat his homework on his birthday?
He heard it was a piece of cake.
17. What does every birthday end with?
The letter Y.
18. Why don’t owls requite each other birthday presents?
They don’t requite a hoot.
19. Did you hear well-nigh the birthday candle sale?
It was a big blowout.
20. Why can’t kids remember past birthdays?
Because they’re too focused on the present.
Funny Yo Mama Jokes for Kids
21. Yo mama so special, she’s limited edition.
22. Yo mama so tall, she CAN taste the rainbow.
23. Yo mama so strict, she put Godzilla and King Kong in timeout for fighting.
24. Yo mama so strong, the Madrigals thought she was Louisa.
25. Yo mama so cool, her hugs requite you frostbite.
26. Yo mama so smart, she knows things not plane Google knows.
27. Yo mama so short, she does pull-ups on a staple.
28. Yo mama so loud, she speaks in surround sound.
29. Yo mama so tall, Mount Everest was her pet rock.
30. Yo mama so short, when she went to see Santa, he told her to get when to work.
Funny Math Jokes for Kids
31. What do geometry teachers have decorating their floors?
Area rugs!
32. Why did the math typesetting squint so sad?
Because it had so many problems.
33. Do you know what seems odd to me?
Numbers that aren’t divisible by two.
34. What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!
35. How do you make seven an plane number?
Remove the S.
36. Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
37. What shape do you unchangingly have to be shielding of?
A trap-azoid!
38. Why do teenagers unchangingly travel in groups of three, five, or seven?
Because they can’t even!
39. What did the triangle say to the circle?
You’re pointless.
40. Which king loved fractions?
Henry the eighth.
41. How does a mathematician plow fields?
With a pro-tractor.
42. My math teacher has a piece of graph paper.
I think he must be plotting something!
43. What’s a math teacher’s favorite kind of tree?
Geometry.
44. A kid said to his math teacher: To show you how good I am at fractions, I only did half my homework!
45. I had an treatise with a 90-degree angle.
Turns out it was right.
46. Parallel lines have so much in common.
It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
47. What do you undeniability a number that can’t stand still?
A roamin’ numeral!
48. Why does algebra modernize your dancing skills?
Because you can use algo-rhythm.
49. What’s a math teacher’s favorite place in NYC?
Times Square.
50. Are monsters good at math?
Not unless you Count Dracula.
Funny Unprepossessing Jokes for Kids
51. Why are elephants so wrinkled?
Because they take too long to iron!
52. Why did the gum navigate the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot!
53. Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Of course! The Empire State Building can’t jump!
54. What do you undeniability a withstand with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
55. What do you undeniability a pig that knows karate?
A pork chop!
56. What did the snail riding on the turtle’s when say?
Wheeeee!
57. What unprepossessing keeps the weightier time?
A watchdog.
58. How does an octopus go into battle?
Well-armed.
59. What do you undeniability a bee who can’t make up his mind?
A maybe.
60. Why can’t a leopard hide?
He’s unchangingly spotted.
61. What do you get when a yellow lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
62. Where do polar bears alimony their money?
In a snowbank.
63. What unprepossessing has increasingly lives than a cat?
Frogs! They croak every night.
64. What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
Ruff!
65. Why do sharks live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.
66. Why did the turkey navigate the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
67. What do you undeniability a horse that lives next door?
A neigh-bor.
68. What do you get when you navigate a snake and a pie?
A pie-thon.
69. What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for a trip?
Bi-son!
70. Where do polar bears vote?
The North Poll.
71. What did the mama cow say to the calf?
It’s pasture bedtime!
72. What do you undeniability an illegally parked frog?
Toad!
73. What fish only swims at night?
A starfish.
74. What kind of dog does a magician have?
A labracadabrador!
75. What did the farmer say well-nigh the cow who couldn’t produce milk?
It was an udder failure.
76. What are ducks’ favorite food?
Quackers.
77. What do you undeniability an alligator who solves mysteries?
An investigator.
78. What do you get when you navigate a snail with a porcupine?
A slowpoke.
79. What’s a cat’s favorite dessert?
Chocolate mouse.
Funny Pirate Jokes for Kids
80. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
The letter RRRRRRR
81. What is a pirate’s hairstyle called?
A hairdo cut!
82. Why do people find it very nonflexible to undeniability a pirate?
Because he unchangingly leaves his phone off the hook.
83. Why can’t pirates learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at “C”!
84. What is a pirate’s favorite type of fish?
Swordfish!
85. What’s a pirate’s favorite movie?
Booty and the Beast.
86. How did the pirate get his Jolly Roger so cheap?
He got it on sail.
87. What do pirates put on their toast?
Jelly Roger.
88. What do pirates do on Black Friday?
Shop the sails.
89. What’s a pirate’s favorite type of exercise?
The plank!
90. What two football teams played in the Pirate Super Bowl?
The Seahawks and the Buccaneers.
91. What do you undeniability a pirate who skips school?
Captain Hooky.
92. What pirate movies can’t kids go see?
The ones that are rated Rrrrrrrrr.
93. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Interrupting pirate.
Interrupting pir—
Yarrrrrrr!!!
94. Where do pirates buy their hooks?
The secondhand store.
Funny Cat Jokes for Kids
95. What’s a cat’s favorite movie?
The Sound of Mew-sic
96. Why was the cat playing on the computer for hours?
He wanted to alimony an eye on the mouse.
97. Why can’t a group of cats get together to play cards?
There are too many cheetahs.
98. Why did the cat get mad when you didn’t laugh at his joke?
He took it purrrr-sonally.
99. What’s it tabbed when all the cat treats are gone?
A cat-astrophe.
100. What do you undeniability a cat who lives at the beach?
Sandy Claws.
101. What do you undeniability an old tomcat?
Grand-paw.
102. Why do cats hate laptops?
They don’t have a mouse.
103. How do you spell mousetrap using only three letters?
C-A-T.
104. What did the cat say without making a bad joke?
Just kitten.
105. What is the cat’s favorite sawed-off on the remote?
The paws button.
106. Why do cats make terrible storytellers?
They only have one tail.
107. What do you get when you navigate a cat with a parrot?
A carrot.
108. How do you spell cat backward?
C-A-T-B-A-C-K-W-A-R-D
109. What did the cat say when he fell off the table?
Me-ow.
Funny Halloween Jokes for Kids
11o. What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling.
111. Why didn’t the skeleton go to school?
His heart wasn’t in it.
112. What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
He is mist.
113. How do you fix a croaky pumpkin?
With a pumpkin patch.
114. What room does a ghost not need?
A living room.
115. Where does a ghost go on vacation?
Mali-boo.
116. Who won the skeleton eyeful contest?
No body.
117. Why can’t you invite twin witches to a party?
You can never tell which witch is which!
118. What’s in a ghost’s nose?
Boo-gers.
119. What does a skeleton wear to a Halloween party?
A human costume.
120. Why are graveyards so noisy?
Because of all the coffin.
121. Why did the police officer ticket the ghost on Halloween?
It didn’t have a haunting license.
122. What game do victual ghosts like to play?
Peek-a-boo!
123. What kind of music do mummies like to listen to on Halloween?
Wrap music.
124. What do you undeniability a witch who lives at the beach?
A sand-witch.
125. What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
Do you believe in people?
126. Where does a mummy go on vacation?
The Dead Sea.
127. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ben.
Ben who?
Ben waiting for snacks all day.
128. What do you get when you navigate a vampire and a snowman?
Frostbite.
129. What do skeletons order at restaurants?
Spare ribs.
130. How does a vampire start a letter?
Tomb it may concern!
Funny Thanksgiving Jokes for Kids
131. What do you undeniability a running turkey?
Fast food.
132. What was served without Grandpa sat on the turkey?
Squash.
133. Why was the turkey in jail?
Fowl play.
134. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Annie.
Annie who?
Annie soul see the turkey?
135. Why didn’t the melt season the Thanksgiving turkey?
There was no thyme!
136. What did the turkey say to the computer?
Google, google.
137. What did Han Solo say to Luke Skywalker on Thanksgiving?
May the forks be with you.
138. If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does a turkey come from?
A poul-tree.
139. What song should you listen to on Thanksgiving?
“All Well-nigh That Baste.”
140. What happens to the cranberries without you are rude to them?
They turn into blueberries.
141. What’s a potato’s favorite game to play?
MASH.
142. Why was the turkey asked to join the band?
He could bring his own drumsticks.
143. My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but I said I couldn’t quit unprepossessed turkey.
144. What has feathers and webbed feet?
A turkey wearing scuba gear.
145. Why can’t you let turkeys go near little kids?
They have fowl language.
146. What should you wear to Thanksgiving dinner?
A har-VEST.
147. What’s the weightier thing to put in a pumpkin pie?
Your teeth!
148. What Thanksgiving treat is most popular at the kids’ table?
Crayon-berry sauce.
149. What did the sweet potato say when asked if it was hungry?
Yes, I yam.
150. When are turkeys the most grateful?
The day without Thanksgiving.
Funny Christmas Jokes for Kids
151. What did the wise men say without offering their gifts of gold and frankincense?
Wait, there’s myrrh.
152. What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
Claus-trophobia!
153. What do you undeniability an elf wearing earmuffs?
Anything you want! He can’t hear you!
154. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Snowflakes.
155. What did the gingerbread man put on his bed?
A cookie sheet!
156. Why didn’t Rudolph get a good report card?
Because he went lanugo in history.
157. What happens if you eat Christmas decorations?
You get tinsel-itus.
158. How do the elves wipe Santa’s sleigh?
They use Santa-tizer.
159. What kind of photos do elves take?
Elfies.
160. What does Santa do when the reindeer momentum too fast?
He holds on for deer life.
161. What did one Christmas tree say to the other?
Lighten up!
162. How do Christmas trees get their email?
They log on.
163. Why does Mrs. Claus like Beyoncé so much?
She sleighs.
164. What do you undeniability Santa when he stops moving?
Santa Pause.
165. What do you get when you mix a Christmas tree and an iPad?
A pineapple!
166. What does Mrs. Claus say when there are clouds in the sky?
“It looks like rain, deer.”
167. What’s every parent’s favorite Christmas carol?
Silent Night.
168. What’s the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the regular alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has No-el.
169. What kind of car do elves momentum in the off-season?
Mini-vans!
170. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Doughnut.
Doughnut who?
Doughnut unshut this present until Christmas!
Funny Easter Jokes for Kids
171. Why did the victual chick navigate the road?
To meet up with her peeps.
172. What kind of beans grow in the garden on Easter?
Jelly beans!
173. What sport should you play on Easter?
Basket-ball.
174. What stories do eggs tell their children?
Yolk tales.
175. What do you say without you burp during Easter brunch?
Eggs-cuse me!
176. Would February March?
No, but April May.
177. Why did the jellybean go to school?
Because he really wanted to be a Smartie.
178. How do you know carrots are good for your eyesight?
Have you overly seen a rabbit wearing glasses?
179. Christmas comes surpassing Easter in one place only. Where is it?
The Dictionary!
180. What does a bunny like to flit to?
Hip-hop.
181. Why are you so tired in April?
Because you just finished a March.
182. Where does the Easter Bunny like to eat?
IHOP.
183. How many eggs can you put in an empty basket?
Only one. Without that, it’s not empty anymore.
184. What happens if you get married on Easter?
You live hoppily overly after.
185. What do you undeniability an Easter Bunny who gets kicked out of school?
Eggs-spelled.
186. What do polite bunnies say?
Eggs-cuse me!
187. What do you undeniability a rabbit with fleas?
Bugs Bunny.
188. What do eggs do when they hear a joke?
They one-liner up.
189. Where does the Easter Bunny get his eggs?
From an eggplant.
190. What kind of bunny can’t hop?
A chocolate bunny.
Funny Sports Jokes for Kids
191. What has eighteen legs and catches flies?
A baseball team.
192. Why do basketball players love doughnuts?
Because they can dunk them!
193. What runs virtually a baseball field but never moves?
The fence!
194. Why are peppers weightier at archery?
Because they habanero!
195. Why was the mentor yelling at the vending machine?
He wanted his quarter back.
196. How is a baseball team like a pancake?
They both need a good batter.
197. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In specimen he got a slum in one!
198. Where do football players go when they need new uniforms?
New Jersey.
199. Which baseball player can hold water the best?
The pitcher.
200. Why can’t Cinderella play soccer?
Because she’s unchangingly running yonder from the ball.
201. Why are hockey rinks unchangingly rounded?
Because if they were 90 degrees, the ice would melt.
202. What’s the hardest part of skydiving?
The ground!
203. Why is tennis such a loud sport?
The players raise a racquet.
204. What’s a golfer’s favorite letter?
Tee!
205. What’s a UPS worker’s favorite sport?
Boxing.
Funny Random Jokes for Kids
206. What do you get when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street?
A traffic jam.
207. What do you undeniability it when a snowman throws a tantrum?
A meltdown.
208. How do you organize a space party?
You planet.
209. Why did the dinosaur navigate the road?
Because the yellow wasn’t born yet.
210. What did one hat say to the other hat?
You wait here, I’ll go on ahead.
211. Two muffins are sultry in an oven.
One of them looks to the other and says, “Phew, it’s getting hot in here!”
The other looks when and says, “Ack! A talking muffin!”
212. How did the student finger when he learned well-nigh electricity?
Totally shocked.
213. What do you undeniability a boomerang that won’t come back?
A stick.
214. How does a scientist freshen her breath?
With experi-mints.
215. Which is faster, hot or cold?
Hot, considering you can reservation cold.
216. What falls in the winter but never gets hurt?
Snow.
217. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You’re welcome.
218. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow use. The joke’s over.
219. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you.
220. Why did the robber unravel into the bakery?
He heard the cakes were rich.
221. Why do oranges wear sunscreen?
So they don’t peel.
222. What did the right eye say to the left eye?
Between you and me, something smells.
223. What do you undeniability cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese!
224. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
A little old lady.
A little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
225. Why did the man run virtually his bed?
Because he was trying to reservation up on his sleep!
226. What do you undeniability a fake noodle?
An impasta!
227. How do you tell the difference between a manful and a cow?
It is either one or the udder.
228. What did one plate say to the other?
Dinner is on me.
229. What does a lemon say when it answers the phone?
Yellow!
230. Why can’t you trust tacos?
Because they unchangingly spill the beans.
And there you have it. Increasingly than 200 jokes for kids to tickle their funny bones, make them forget well-nigh why they were grumpy older (hint: they probably had to do chores), and requite them a silly and joyful worriedness to pass the time—just like their parents and grandparents used to do as kids.
Humor is good for the soul without all—no matter what age you are.
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